September 10, 2014

Hello friends! I have another fantastic dear debt letter! I can’t believe it’s been a little over a year since I launched the dear debt letter project! I’m so thankful for everyone who has participated. As you probably know, I focus a lot on the emotions related to debt — so having an outlet to empower myself and others, by writing breakup letters to debt has been such a fantastic opportunity. I have learned so much from your letters — you are my inspiration and why I keep going.

Today, we have a letter from Kassandra, who has made it to the other side. More about her: Kassandra Dasent is a self-employed wife and step-mom striving to live life beyond what money can buy.  In addition to working as a freelance writer and business consultant, Kassandra blogs at More Than Just Money about a variety of topics and personal experiences that all intersect with money.

Dear Debt,

It’s been close to two years since we’ve last spoken to each other but don’t get any ideas on rekindling our relationship. I gotta admit, you and I go way back. We met when I was in college and you made sure to stay super-glue close to me no matter what was going on in my life.

If I had a wedding to go to and couldn’t buy the dress in cash, you hooked me up and made sure I looked fly. If I wanted to see Paris twice in one year, you never failed to deliver the tickets. When I had leased a new car, you stepped up a time or two to make sure we didn’t lose the ride. You were the ultimate sugar daddy!

But after a decade of our crazy ways, I noticed that you couldn’t give me what I wanted anymore. It first started with you spending less time with me because your credit limits were maxed out. Our relationship deteriorated when I got divorced. I resented you because I barely had any money left over from my paycheques after settling up with you. Then you totally screwed me over on a bad business deal. You know you had to go after all that!

It really hurt because I thought we were like Bonnie & Clyde – ride or die – but I saw how cold and heartless you really were. You not only took my money but you stole my self worth. You’re damn right I deleted your voicemails asking for me to take you back and I also ripped up your tempting letters promising me that the good old days were just around the corner.

I was too busy cleaning up the colossal mess you and I made together by working my tail off, selling the furniture (that one must have cut you like a knife) and learning what it meant to live with less and be happier for it – ALL WITHOUT YOU! If you really want to know how I feel about you now, listen to John Legend’s “Used to Love U”.

More and more people are getting the real 411 about you Debt. I’ll do you a solid and tell you that there’s an entire army of bloggers, including me, that are dedicating their time to teaching others on how to get rid of you for good. In fact, they’ve even gone so far as to congregate together yearly at this event called FinCon where they offer tools and strategies to help people kick your ass to the curb.

If I were you Debt, I’d be scared…very scared.

It’s been all kinds of real.



If you are interested in writing a dear debt letter, please get in touch with me! Anonymity respected.




Melanie is a freelance writer currently living in Portland, Oregon. She is passionate about education, financial literacy, and empowering people to take control of their finances. She writes about breaking up with debt, freelancing, and side hustle adventures at

Currently she puts more than 50% of her income towards debt, while living a frugal, fun life. In addition to her love of personal finance, art and music, she is also a karaoke master. Follow the adventure @DearDebtBlog.

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  1. Kirsten says:

    Love it! What power! Be afraid debt, be very afraid!
    Kirsten recently posted…Why I Stayed (Or Better Put: Why Are You Staying?)My Profile

  2. Taylor Lee says:

    I love these debt letters! Congratulations Kassandra on leaving that no good tagalong behind.
    Taylor Lee recently posted…How Do I Build An Age-Appropriate Wardrobe?My Profile

  3. Awesome letter, Kassandra! I love your portrayal of FinCon as a debt-hating conference. Hello, my name is ___ and I hate debt! Hah!
    Mrs. Frugalwoods recently posted…Great Trash Finds: The Sister EditionMy Profile

  4. Ha! I see debt like the OCD Monster I tell my daughter to fight. Gotta get him down and keep him down!
    debs @ debt debs recently posted…Six Month Blogiversary!My Profile

  5. This letter makes me smile and think about my dear debt letter when I’m on the other side. I’ve never thought of it that way, and I kind of like it! I can’t wait to tell Sallie Mae that I never want to see her again.
    Natalie @ Financegirl recently posted…We’re Giving Away 20 Personal Finance eBooksMy Profile

  6. lol I love your letter! Man with all these dear debt letters, debt must be cowering in a corner right now! Hopefully! Glad you are no longer in a bad relationship. 🙂
    Tonya@Budget and the Beach recently posted…Saving vs Spending…Offense vs Defense?My Profile

  7. Michelle says:

    I’m going to play Bonnie and Clyde by Beyonce and Jay Z now.
    Michelle recently posted…FIve of The Most Compelling Blog Posts That I’ve Read Since 2012-2014My Profile

  8. Awesome letter Kassandra. Congrats on kicking your debt and thanks for inspiring others to do the same!
    Stefanie @ The Broke and Beautiful Life recently posted…Why I’m Giving Up My Daily Latte. Trust Me, It’s Not Why You Think.My Profile

  9. Wow! Debt better not show his face to Kassandra , she is so over him. But debt is nothing but a seductive Casanova and could care less who he hurts during his conquests. Always on the hunt for his next.
    Great read!
    LeisureFreak Tommy recently posted…Change to a Passion Driven LifeMy Profile

  10. Nice! This is the first Dear Debt letter I’ve seen on here, but I like the series!
    Ben @ The Wealth Gospel recently posted…Feeling Helpless: An Update on Our DebtMy Profile

  11. What a great concept for a blog! And what a great post! I look forward to the day when my debt is paid off and I can send a break-up letter to Dear Debt. And Kassandra, if you think your 10-year relationship with debt was too long, just be glad you didn’t have my 25-year relationship with it. I’m getting out of it, but it’s taking time. Enjoy your well-deserved freedom!
    Prudence Debtfree recently posted…Small Miracle for Debt-ReductionMy Profile

  12. That Bonnie & Clyde image is fantastic! I’ve always viewed debt as a monster under the bed, which is why I’ve kept it away, so it’s fascinating to read about someone else’s psychology. Thanks for sharing your story, Kassandra.
    Broke Millennial recently posted…How to Set Your Rates as a FreelancerMy Profile

  13. LOL Mrs FW! Thanks so much 🙂
    Kassandra @ More Than Just Money recently posted…Dear Debt: Success Is The Best RevengeMy Profile

  14. Aldo @MDN says:

    haha, I like the last line, “If I were you Debt, I’d be scared…very scared.”

    It is cool to see that more and more of us are joining forces to defeat this monster. If we form a Justice League of sorts, I want to be Budget Boy! lol
    Aldo @MDN recently posted…50th Blog Post!!!My Profile

  15. Alexis says:

    I love reading such an inspirational and motivational post about debt! It can become so overwhelming at times since I am a college student and I have to look at debt straight in the face! Haha.

  16. Mackenzie says:

    AWESOME dear debt letter!! For real 🙂
    Mackenzie recently posted…If I Could Go Back In TimeMy Profile

  17. As always Kassandra, I love the spunky attitude you have! I am sure debt is cowering in the corner right now =).
    Erin @ Journey to Saving recently posted…Are You Financially Fit?My Profile

  18. Kassandra, this ROCKS. 🙂 Seriously: you gave me SO much motivation today: thank you. 🙂

  19. Nice! I would definitely be scared if I were your debt =) I also agree that success if the best revenge- always has been.
    Holly@ClubThrifty recently posted…Carnival Sensation Review (And a $100 Giveaway)My Profile

  20. “It really hurt because I thought we were like Bonnie & Clyde – ride or die – but I saw how cold and heartless you really were. You not only took my money but you stole my self worth.”

    Powerful stuff, Kassandra!!!
    Femme Frugality recently posted…Favorite Free Online Shopping App: Buy HappyMy Profile

  21. Simon E. says:

    As far as debt letters go…yours Kassandra is personal 🙂 And that title is right on…stick it to debt!
    Am yet to write my victory letter…but this resonated with me, debt is cold and heartless…robs us of even our feelings of self-worth, if we let it.
    Simon E. recently posted…Barnes and Noble MasterCard® ReviewMy Profile

  22. Now I have that John Legend song stuck in my head! *Baby when I used to love youuuuuu* Love this letter!

  23. I love this! Way to kick your debt to the curb and never let it back in 🙂
    Brandy @ Busted Budget recently posted…Frugal Finds: Spoons and Boxes and Cheese, Oh My!My Profile

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