Till Every Drop is Gone

Happy Monday, folks! Got a Case of the Mondays? Well, you’re in luck. We have a fabulous, sock-it-to-you, dance around and listen to Spice Girls awesome dear debt letter. Yeah, I just went there. 🙂

Today’s letter is by none other than the lovely Prudence, which reminds me of one of my favorite Beatles songs (I’m sure she gets that a lot). Prudence Debtfree and her husband are working their way out of debts that totaled $257,000 in June of 2012. They’re down to $150,000 now, and you can follow their progress at Prudence Debtfree: One Couple’s Journey out of Debt.

Dear Debt,

You’re getting worried, aren’t you? I’ve been bringing you down steadily for over two and a half years now. Twenty months, Buddy. I know what you were thinking at first: She thinks she can live without me. Yeah, right! Give her time, and she’ll come running back to me. Like she always has. Like she always will. I’ve given you good reason to think that way – I admit it. After all, I was  your faithful partner for almost twenty-five years.

When we first got together, you were like a knight in shining armor. I needed a car to get to my new job, and you allowed me to have one. Instant relief. Instant convenience. Instant power. I saw you as the answer. And what did you ask for in return? Not much at all. A small monthly payment that was easy for me to cover. Just a little drop in the bucket.

I relied upon you more and more as you came through time and again. You were there for me when I wanted to shop for clothes. You were there for me when I wanted new furniture. You were there for me when I just felt like treating myself to a meal at a restaurant or a night at the theatre. Or a week-end ski trip. I’d heard somewhere that I deserved it. That I could have it now. That it would make me happy. And you proved it all true each and every time!

You’d even had a long-standing relationship with the man who would become my husband! How expansive and open you were! And you never said “No.” We never felt we were asking too much of you. A bit of travel. A new vehicle to accommodate our growing family. A weekly cleaning service to ease the busy-ness of life. Our dream home . . .

But then there was job loss. Limited income. And all of those monthly payments – now an abundance of drops in the bucket – added up to a burden that we could barely manage. Month after month after month . . . And still you promised to be the answer. And still we believed you! Now’s your chance to pursue your interest and take that course! And isn’t that cute pure-bred puppy just perfect for your daughter?  What were we thinking? You had become such an unquestioned part of our lives – such a knee-jerk solution – that we still didn’t see you for what you were!

When we decided to take the home business route, we needed you again. See, I’m still the one to make your dreams come true, you said. And things did work out. But we now felt uneasy around you. Your charm was still seductive, but your promises were hollow. You weren’t in the business of making our dreams come true; you were in the business of gaining from those “little” monthly payments – and we’d been sensitized to them. Drip, drip, drip . . . They drained us. We recognized the power you had over us. We wanted to be free of you.

But you’d made us financially flabby. No muscle tone. And at first, it was frustrating –  stumbling on imperfectly and with limited effectiveness at times. Budgeting was annoying. Cutting our expenses felt like deprivation. Tracking our money was drudgery. Unexpected expenses threatened to derail us. But they didn’t. And we’ve toned up – gained some endurance. And we’re only getting stronger.

You’ve become smaller, Debt, and you don’t overwhelm me anymore. I’m bigger than you are. Your siren call still sings to me from time to time. But I know how to answer it. You deserve it! Deserve what? Years of drip, drip, draining payments? You can have it now! But I can have it later too – at cost – once I’ve saved for it. And frankly, I might choose not to have it even then. It will make you happy. No it won’t. Happiness does not come with a purchased product, service, or experience. I’ve finally figured that out. You’ve lost your charm and your powers of seduction.

But I know you. Your wandering eye has found a multitude of partners even while I’ve been working through this slow motion break-up. You’ve presented yourself as the answer, the solution, the ticket to dreams come true to all sorts of seekers on the market. Still, you are apprehensive, aren’t you? Because the secret is out, and I’m not the only one who recognizes you for what you are. There are plenty of us who see right through you.. And we’re dropping you. Bit by bit. Drip, drip, draining you. Until you’re gone.

Photo: http://deathtothestockphoto.com/

• Author
• Recent Posts

Melanie

Melanie Lockert is the founder of the blog and author of the book, Dear Debt. Through her blog, she chronicled her journey out of $81,000 in student loan debt. She is also the co-founder of the Lola Retreat, which helps bold women face their fears, own their dreams and figure out a plan to be in control of their finances. She is passionate about empowering women, helping others get out of debt, and focuses on the intersection of debt and mental health. Every September she organizes a Suicide Prevention Awareness Blog Tour, to help share resources for those struggling with debt and suicide. In addition to her love of personal finance, art and music, she is also a karaoke master and a cat mom to Miles and Thelonious.

Latest posts by Melanie (see all)

• Talking About Money and Mental Health - September 12, 2022
• Dear Debt, We’re Better Apart - June 27, 2022
• Announcing The Mental Health and Wealth Summit - May 4, 2021