Life is expensive.
Life is hard.
Life is a work in progress.
This is what feels true for me right now. It feels like this past week, with the wild full moon, that everything has been out of whack (anyone else?).
It seems every day there was something new. An unexpected expense, a miscommunication, a misunderstanding, or something else to add to the pile.
All in all, each frustrating moment was small in and of itself — but compounded over time, these things have added up and have chipped away at my strength.
I don’t want to write a total Debbie Downer post, but you know I’m never one to put on a front. I’m a pretty emotional creature that wears my heart on my sleeve (for better or worse). And this week has been tough. I’m actively taking steps to take care of myself and put myself first. But in the process of doing so, I have to wrap up several things and hustle to make things happen. Change doesn’t happen overnight.
This was the first week since being self-employed that I felt like giving up. It was the first time that I thought maybe going back to a real job would be easier and I could just work 9-5 and call it a day. I also thought about giving up on debt. Looking at my repayments, I see that so much is going to interest, it feels so pointless.
But I have to remember the wisdom of my friends: hard work sucks, but quitting sucks harder. I’m just going through some growing pains. It’s like I’ve grown 6 inches in 6 months and I’m in that awkward, clumsy phase.
Life is also changing so quickly. We were notified that our month-to-month lease would go up $120 per month if we didn’t sign another 6 or 12 month lease. So we signed a 6 month lease, paying $60 more each month, and then we’ll probably move. Back to LA or NYC? Somewhere else? We’re not sure yet, but we’re 98% certain we’re not staying here. I’m ready for a change. But I’m beyond stressed about the financial part of it, as we need to boost our income significantly to make this happen. Luckily, I can move anywhere and make money, but my income still needs to grow.
So, that’s what’s going on with me. I apologize for the silence here and will be posting some more debt updates soon. Even though I’ve felt like giving up, this community keeps me going. I haven’t been as active as I want to be, but I’m so inspired by bloggers and readers alike. Keep rockin’ the journey. I guess this is part of the adventure.
For some further reading/listening:
The Privilege Of Pursuing Financial Independence by the FrugalWoods (a super important part that is often glaringly missing from conversations).
Why Are We Deferring Our College Loans? by the brilliant satirists at the Onion.
If you saw me at FinCon, you know I LOVE dancing. So this story about a group of women that are throwing a party for a man who was body shamed while dancing, completely warmed my heart and made my day.
I was featured in this article about weird jobs that can help you pay off debt, talking about my experience walking invisible dogs as a brand ambassador.
I sat down with my friend Eric and talked about quitting my job to pursue my dream. Listen to the podcast.
I also set down with my gal pals in the PF world for a hilarious happy hour. Listen to me talk about my cheap ex-boyfriend.
I hope you have a great weekend!